The Dorkiness That Occurred

So, I got a comment on my last post, *Bang Head Here*, which said...

"if we are gonna help you - we gotta know, what dorkiness occurred?"

It was from an anonymous reader. I have no idea who it was, but if it was you...well I guess you can remain anonymous if you really want. I was going to ask you to reveal yourself-but if you don't want to that's ok. Anonymous is just so-mysterious.

What dorkiness occurred, you ask?

Well it's not so much the dorkiness that occurred as the dorkiness that seems to infiltrate every manner of my being when I am around...cute girls.
Granted, dorkiness is just a part of who I am. But it is especially accute around women. I can usually get past it once get to know the woman. But the beginning process...is...is like I'm a the president of the awkward club.
I can't speak correctly.
I can't string together sentences properly.
And sometimes I just don't freakin' talk at all. I just sit or stand there with a dopey-ass grin on my face hoping the girl doesn't notice how red I'm getting in the face.
Granted, I've always been a little shy. It does take me a while to feel comfortable enough to...uh...open my mouth. Hahaha...
Sometimes, I feel like I'm back in high school. Scoffing my feet and the ground, looking shyly to the floor, and saying in my head, "Well gosh, I think she's cute." I never really went through that stage when I should have because I wasn't interested really in boys, you know?
So even though I've had a girlfriend, even though sometimes I am a good flirt...if I meet someone I'm truly interested in I turn into a puddle of dorky mess.
I know everyone gets this way on some level. I know it's stupid to think I could or should be exempt from this...
...but damn!
I am SO dorky, guys. Seriously.


It's probably just a matter of confidence.
Which I'm trying to remedy by listening to Justin Timberlake's "Sexyback."
And so I listen to it and I think:
"Heck yes I can bring Sexyback!"
"Heck yes I'm totally hot and 10 kinds of fine!"
"Heck yes I could make any girl fall in love with me!"
"Heck yes I'm totally going to tell this girl I think she's cute the next time I see her."
...and then I see her.
And I can barely make eye contact.
So I have to go "give her flowers" via facebook superpoke instead.
Isn't that sad?
And if you don't know what facebook or facebook superpoke is...be glad.
I alternately praise its glory and curse its existence.

So that's the dorkiness that did not occur but does occur and will probably continue to occur until the day I die.

Here's to me and all the other dorks up there.
Bottoms Up!
*I just finished up the dregs of my glass of Chocolate Milk made with NesQuik powder, in case you were wondering*
Like I said...
DORK


....mmmm, but NesQuik is so good. Especially the crap at the bottom. Mmmm.....