Just A Post-O-Quotes

QUOTES OF THE DAY (In order of their appearance)

8:00 am in my car on my way to work. The Knights of Columbus are out on the streets taking donations for, as it stated on their yellow vests "retarded" kids. Yeah. I'm not joking. It said retarded. P.C. alert.
OLD MAN: Would you like to donate to retarded kids? (Disclaimer: His words. Not mine.)
ME: Sure. (I give him some change)
OLD MAN: Well thank you so much. (He hands me some Kights of Columbus Tootsie Rolls) Here. Take these.
ME: Oh, thanks.
OLD MAN: Do you have kids?
ME: (Laughing) Um, no.
OLD MAN: Ok, well then you eat them...(looks me up and down) you're figure is slim anyway.
ME: Um...thanks?
Gotta love creepy old men with yellow vests saying "Help Retarded Kids."

3:30-ish Box Office
DAVID: Um, can you get this pen off my desk? (Handing me the pen like it's diseased).
ME: Uh...what's wrong with it?
DAVID: It doesn't have a cap.
ME: ...Ok...
DAVID: Yeah, it's a little OCD, but it doesn't have a cap and it annoys me and I can't have it sitting on my desk.
ME: Ok. Man, I knew you didn't like pens without caps but I had no idea it was this extreme.
DAVID: Oh yeah. I just can't take it or deal with pens without caps. I used to throw them out if they didn't have caps until Carly made me start giving them to her. (I put the pen deliberately in my pen cup). Thanks.

6:50-ish Bus Stop. Man is having a long conversation with what I gathered was the CTA. He is telling them how they should route their buses. He did not work for the CTA. He was just a dude with a cell phone. Come to think of it the cell phone looked a little banged up. Maybe he was actually talking to no one in his phone. But he gets off the phone and...
MAN: You just missed the bus.
ME: Oh, darn.
MAN: Don't worry another one should be here soon. I called them and told them to send another one out.
ME: Oh, ok.
MAN: Yeah, supposedly they got a new guy down there who's trying to clean up the system.
ME: Ha.
MAN: I thought so too, but they were having a meeting and when I called the meeting just got done, so I think this new general manager down there is doing a good job.
ME: Oh. Good, I hope so.
MAN: Me too. I call them a lot. I call the garage directly and not just the regular CTA number.
ME: Oh.
MAN: Here, do you have a cell phone? I'll give it to you so you can call them and let your voice be heard if you're unhappy with their service.
ME: Um, ok...(So I take out my cell phone and the guy recites it off the top of his head) Thanks.
MAN: No problem.
So, I actually did take the number down. I'm kinda curious to call it and see if it's actually the CTA or if it's just a random number this guy made up and was just crazy.

7:45-ish Theatre
DAVID: So I had this dream that the CTA would take me anywhere as long as I told them it was a "transportation emergency."
Like, "Um, does this bus go to Arlington Heights?" and the bus driver said no. And I said, "But this is a transportation emergency!! And then he took me to Arlington Heights.

11:30-ish. At home.
SARA: So have you ever seen a movie called The Elephant Man?
ME: No.
SARA: I just got it on Netflix.
ME: Yeah, it's a play too. I've never seen it or read it. I didn't know it was a movie.
SARA: Really?
ME: Yeah. If you say "Elephant Man" to me...I think "play." It won some Tonys.
SARA: Oh. Well I know it as a movie.
ME: I think it was a play first.
SARA: Actually I think it was a book first.
ME: I have no idea.
SARA: It's like what came first...the chicken or the egg? The book or the play or the movie?
ME: Well I know what came first.
SARA: What?
ME: Well, The Elephant Man.
SARA: Of course. The Elephant Man.
ME: The man.
SARA: So I guess it's really a question of what came second...