ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

This is the best zoo ever. You get to RIDE the lions!!!! (Ok, so they were actually just statues that were sitting there when we got off the train but still.)


The "adaptable" animal exhibit. Apparently, these animals are so adaptable...they're invisible. It was the most amazing thing I'd ever seen.


This is a little boy....right before he got eaten by a goose.


Zebra: A pony with stripes since God created them and the earth a couple thousand years ago.


I do not have similar life problems to this giraffe.


WARNING THE FOLLOWING PHOTO IS RATED PG-13...


This dude was making out with this tree for the whole 10-15 minutes we stood watching the giraffes. Seriously. There was some tongue action going on up in the giraffe exhibit. We think this giraffe is shunned by his fellow giraffes for his love of trees. Tree-loving/making out: the homosexuality of the giraffe world.


In a past life I was a kangaroo in this picture via Carly because I was too busy bein' a Kangaroo to take a picture with my camera.


Yes. Yes. I am small enough to hide with the mongooses. No, I thought it was mongeese too. But it's not. The plural of mongoose is mongooses. I know. It blew my mind too. Also, it's really nice to know if I fail at everything I ever attempt in my life at least I know I'm small enough to live with mongooses.


At the zoo I was attacked by a tiger. Sure as I am bloggin' here today Bill saved me. Thanks, Bill. You're a pal.



PENGUIN!! Come here and give me a hug!! Hurry! Hurry!!

Also...at this point it's worth point out what happened at almost every exhibit:
ME: I just want to give him/her/ it a hug.
CARLY: Yeah. I think that's frowned upon.


Monkey? Or did a gay man's dog get loose at the zoo?? You decide.

A THREE SHOT POLAR BEAR SERIES OF PHOTOS:





AND NOW PRESENTING: THE SCARIEST/MOST AWESOME THING THAT'S EVER HAPPENED TO ME AT A ZOO. EVER.

This is a bear.
Notice that hunk of meat he is knawing on. We guessed it was probably the kneecap of Zookeeper Tim.
So most of the time when you go to the zoo...the animals are sleeping or are standing in their cage with their asses shoved in your face.
Not this time.
We went to see this bear (it's hard to tell from the picture but he was GINORMOUS). I took this picture from the rail. BUT behind the bear and to the right there was a little observation window. So after sitting at the rail for a little bit we went by the window and the bear just sat there...knawing on Zookeeper Tim's kneecap.
We marveled at how huge the bear was.
We marveled at how close he was.
Then we look to the right of the window and notice this little steel door with a padlock.
David looks at it and says, "I wonder if I rattle this around if he'll think food is coming and come over."
So he rattles the padlock around.
The bear turns around to look at us.
At first, it doesn't seem like he's going to bother getting up but then all the sudden he bolts up and comes charging over to the door RIGHT BY the window.
We sorta freak out.
David's like, "Oh my god, we should leave."
The bear gets to the door and WE CAN HEAR IT BREATHING AND SNIFFING US FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF THE THIS STEEL DOOR THAT ALL THE SUDDEN SEEMS VERY FLIMSY.
So the bear is RIGHT BY this window and door looking us up and down no doubt getting our scent and trying to figure out what sorta food was available and/or coming on the other side (ie: US).
We were laughing pretty hard.
Anyway, the bear figured out there was no food to be had and that in fact he had been had by a bunch of knuckleheads (well, one knucklehead (ahem...David...did you learn nothing from the San Francisco Zoo incident. Need I remind you what happend THERE).
So we leave.

...Late David and I walked by again and I swear to God...the bear was sleeping and suddenly picked up his head as we passed.
We were supposed to be his lunch. Now I'm worried I'm going to awaken in the night and find a bear in the apartment like, "I tracked you down you scrawny runt. You won't make much of a meal cause you're so damn little but it ain't about fillin' my belly. This is payback. Oh, before I eat you...will you take a picture with me? I've never met someone who looked so much like Harry Potter and my cubs are big fans and they would just die if they thought I actually met the boy wizard."

Going to the zoo is so much fun.
But I have to admit, I always get a little sad the animals are locked up. But at least at this zoo (Brookfield) where you have to pay to get in the animals seem healthy. Unlike Lincoln Park Zoo. Where when you see an empty exhibit you know it's not 'cause they're moving the animal to a bigger one.