Um. Ok. So by this point you've all probably figured out that I'm a lesbian.
I know.
Shocking.
Here's something that might surprise you: I kinda like fashion. And by fashion I of course mean my version of fashion. you're probably wondering what my version of fashion is. I will tell you in two words:
Jeans. Sneakers.
Yes, yes, I know that makes me horribly lesbian. But I can't help it.
I love shoes (sneakers).
And I love jeans.
I bring it up because I went jean shopping today. I take pride in my jeans. I love my jeans. AND I know what you're going to ask and the answer is: yes. Yes. Just because I am a lesbian does not mean I am not a woman, thus I ALWAYS check how the jeans make my ass look. Always. In fact, that's what I spend most of the time looking at when I buy jeans, straining over my shoulder-looking at my ass-in-jeans.
It's important that I have jeans that are comfortable and classy and for me-that means buying out of the little boy's section in Kohls. I have never ever been comfortable wearing jeans I've bought out of the girls section. Here is my rant about girl jeans:
a) They get all up in my business.
b) If they fit over my hips they're too long in the leg.
c) If they fit in the leg I can't give them over my hips.
d) If I bend down my butt gets chilly.
Um. No Thanks.
Thus, for their comfort and style I like I get boy jeans.
Yes.
I know that makes me horribly gay, but whatever. I probably own one pair of jeans that are actually "girl's jeans."
Now I will talk about sneakers. I have a few pairs of sneakers for all occasions:
Sneakers for going out.
Sneakers for walking outside.
Sneakers for doing stuff where I'm going to get messy.
Sneakers for sneaking.
It is important to have sneakers for all occasions. I don't think I've worn heals since prom. Seriously. You can find a pair of sneakers for any and ever occasion. Seriously.
Ok, with all this talk about jeans and sneakers, you're probably thinking, "Amy, are you a semi-nudist? Don't you wear anything on top?"
No.
I'm not a semi-nudist.
My favorite shirts are my tight fitting black t-shirts that make me look a little like Danny Zuko (maybe just out of the corner of your eye for a split second enough to think "Did Danny Zuko lose 80 pounds and shrink?) and of course...my button-downs.
I know. So gay.
This is just a lesson in lesbian fashion 101.
Um and this post about fashion this is a perfectly segue into my word of the day..
WORD OF THE DAY
Couture: the business of designing fashionable custom-made women's clothing.
And now. In a sentence:
Up until about yesterday, Amy thought that Couture was a designer's name, like Dior or Armani. However, it is not. It simply means what the definition states: fashionable custom-made women's clothing.
And yes. That sentence is true. I did actually think "couture" was a name.
It's not.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
MOM FROM THE STUDIO: You wouldn't send the children out to play in that field next to your building in the rain during a tornado warning, would you?
Yes mam. Yes. We would. We also covered their heads in tin foil and made-up a game called, "who can ground lightening the fastest?"
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1 comment:
you're comment on the quote of the day made MY day. i wish you had said that to her. :) p.s. i think the word verifications on here are getting harder...
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