I Survived The 2008 Midwest Earthquake

It happened around 4:40 am...
I was sleeping in my bed...minding my own business.
I was curled up, arms around my giant dog bear when I felt my bed start to shake. I began to wake up and can remember the distinct sensation of my ass jiggling. As I began to wake up more and realized that in fact my entire bed was shaking several thoughts went through my mind (please remember that my mind works in very strange ways to begin with and this is only exponentially compounded when I'm sleeping, dreaming, or half way in between wakefulness and sleep):

a)"Amy, you've been known to be unable to sit still. Maybe now you've gotten so hyper active you can't SLEEP still. Calm yourself and quit shaking." (Pause) (Pause) "Um...ok that's definitely not me doing that."

b) "Um...my entire bed is shaking."

c) "Some emergency vehicles just drove by...it's probably them shaking the house." (Pause) (Pause) "OK, but they're gone now and my ass is still jiggling."

And this is the part where I lose my sense on reason...
d) "Oh man. I am totally being haunted. There is a ghost under my bed shaking it...oh wait, how could there be anything under my bed my mattress is just on the floor...Still...I think I am being haunted...I mean ghosts are ghosts they wouldn't have to be under the bed to shake it...Something is trying to wake me up! I am going to turn around and there's going to be a poltergeist standing in corner and it's going to be like, "great now that you're up we can get to the really scary shit where I start throwing crap around the room and make the head of the giant dog bear you love so much spin." And then I'll be like, "Mess with my dog bear and you DIE, jerk!" (Pause) (Pause) (I turn and look) (There's nothing there) (The shaking stops) "Great. I'm going back to sleep. Come here dog bear. Nobody is spinning your head as long as you're mine." (Snuggle dog bear. Proceed to pass out)

OK, so I wake up this morning thinking maybe this whole thing was a figment of my CRAZY DREAMING brain. I mean we are talking about me-the girl who dreamed she climbed Mt. Everest on roller skates UNDERWATER. And was so convinced the dream was real when she woke up, was ready to TELL everyone, "Hey I climbed Mt. Everest." And it wasn't until later in the shower when she totally woke up that she was like, "Oh yeah. Dream. Right. Impossible to climb Mt. Everest on roller skates underwater. Good thing I realized this before I told anyone."
THESE ARE THE THINGS THAT MAKE ME QUESTION MY SANITY


...anyway.
So I wake up thinking I made this whole thing up in my dreamy head.
It wasn't until I signed onto facebook and saw everyone's status like, "Earthquake?!" and "Was that an earthquake?" and "What was up with that shaking??" that I figured it out.
Then I checked it out on the news and sure enough..."Earthquake registering 5.4 on the Richter Scale hits Midwest."

Then I was weirded out.

Also...I'm labeling this post with an "Earthquake" tag just because I think it's hilarious that this will be the only post under that label.

I also LOVE that this is a huge deal. It was all over the local news. People in California are probably like, "5.4?! That doesn't even MAKE the news here. I walk my DOG in a 5.4 Earthquake. You Midwesterners are WIMPS."
...and then we laugh at them when they freak out over an inch of snow.