German Haters

Germany is once again rearing its ugly head of hate. This time Germany has directed its hate at the most American of all things...

Tom Cruise.

Seems those old schnitzel-eaters have a problem with Tom Cruise playing anti-Nazi Col. Claus Graf Schenk von Strauffenberg in an upcoming World War II era movie. This Clause von Strauffenberg is regarded as a hero for his attempts to eliminate Hitler back in 1944. Seems ze Germans don't want no Scientologist playing their beloved almost-assassinated-Hitler-hero. Germans, APPARENTLY, see Scientology as a crazy, unfounded, commercialized, religion that takes advantage of people.

Personally, I find the Scientologists', rate-your-internal-being attitude quite endearing. I think the Germans, and other people in general like to pick on Scientology because a science-fiction writer founded it. And nobody in society is held in lower esteem than the "science-fiction-star-trek-dungeons-and-dragons-gamers-never-gonna-get-laid" types. I applaud Tom Cruise for his strength and fortitude in bringing a much needed seriousness and truth to this science fiction field.

So much so that he's passed it off as his religion.

Way to go Tom Cruise. Thanks for proving Science-Fiction followers can get laid. And thank you, Tom Cruise, for proving that any one that follows Science-Fiction (i.e. Scientology) is crazy. In conclusion...crazy people CAN get laid. You, Tom Cruise, are an inspiration. Don't let ze Germans get you down.

Germany, if you read this blog (which I'm sure you do)...lay off the Cruise! Have you ever seen Mission: Impossible? He will break into your country and steal all your German secrets. He will break into your country and read your German diary and tell all your German crushes to the entire world! Don't mess with the Cruise!


I do, however, believe in the end that tom Cruise SHOULD be "disqualified" (if you will) from playing this role. Why, you ask?

Because Tom Cruise simply does not have enough syllables in his name to be playing someone named Col Claus Graf Schenk von Stauffenberg.

Sorry Tom.

Maybe if you changed your name to Tom TomKate Cruise von Scientologistbergensen, you'd have had a chance.