Snow time can sometimes be scary time. Don't believe me? Ok I will try and prove it to you with three words: Pants, Walruses, Plagues. Don't follow? Here's an elaboration on my points:
Point A: I am short. My pants are long. The bottoms of my pants get wet, the wetness travels up my pant leg making for many unpleasant experiences. Also, because of all the salt on the ground, the bottoms of my pants get hard and crusty. Yes, I just said my pants get hard and crusty...and wet. I don't like it very much.
Point B: When you go to a school right on a lake sometimes you worry that the wind will pick you up and dump you in the lake and then the lake will swallow you out to sea and the sea will sweep you to the polar ice caps where you will be adopted by a walrus family and nobody in Chicago will ever hear from you again. Seriously.
Point C: The night before a bad snow/storm can be really scary. You're thinking in your head, "Oh God will school be cancelled tomorrow?? Whatever will happen? Whatever will become of me?" These thoughts are like plagues that attack your mind instead of your firstborn son.
Ok, really though. It can be scary. Here are some things that happened to me:
a) Driving. (Enough said. Scary in this weather)
b) I was crossing the street and because if the way the snow was piled, misjudged where the sidewalk actually was. Instead of step on the sidewalk I stepped onto a small snowbank and got thrown off balance. I wasn't aided by the huge turtle shell (aka backpack) I was carrying and almost faceplanted right into the frozen, snowy ground. As you know though, I have eternal grace and was able to recover from my little miscalculation.
c) The wind was so bad I almost got blown off the train platform onto the tracks. Yeah. It was awesome.
But I'm still alive. (I know you were all worried). Everyone I know is alive. To anyone facing bad weather: stay safe and even if you get blown out to sea and adopted by a walrus I will still love you and remember you.
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3 comments:
uhhh...ok! i'm glad you're alive amy! SPRING BREAK!!!
"These thoughts are like plagues that attack your mind instead of your firstborn son"
Jesus Christ you're funny. You know the 10 Commandments movie with Charleton Heston, when the little green things come down from the sky and choke the firstborns to death? That's my favorite part. I know, I'm sadistic. But really, those little green fingers coming over the moon? That's better than the parting of the Red Sea. Or the bloody Nile. Or the fireball fingers of the LORD (Yahweh) writing in the sacred tablets, which Moses gets after he's freed his people from BONDAGE (that word is said approximately 9,000 times in the movie) while his ungrateful fellow Hebrews partake in debauchery and golden calf revelry and drunkedness.
Woo-hoo! Let's hear it for drunkenness and revelry! Oh wait, that's what they were doing wrong? Nevermind.
Another fabulous post, crusty-pants. Can I call you crusty-pants? :D Yep, driving in snow is something else. And I hate hate hate being cold. I hope you had a nice Valentine's Day.
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