So I need to talk about something. Because honestly I am quite worried and disturbed.
So I have socks. I had maybe 6 or 7 pairs of white socks. And 2 pairs of black socks. And one pair of Halloween socks I wear to buy myself one more day to not do my laundry. If I'm wearing my Halloween socks and it's June...chances are they were the only clean pair I had and I that have a date with a wash machine and a can of Tide the next day.
I wash my socks of course.
And I've noticed that lately that through the laundry process my number of black pairs of socks has increased while my white pairs of socks have significantly decreased.
Don't believe me?
At last count I have 6 pairs of black socks. And 1 pair of white socks.
I have no idea how this happened.
I was and am so disturbed by this event that it's taken me a while to come forward and talk about. But last week when I had three pairs of white socks, and this week when I somehow ended up with only one, I knew I had to come forward.
I know I can't be getting my laundry mixed up with my family's. We all do our own laundry...mine goes from my body, to my hamper in my room, to the machine downstairs, back into my hamper, and then into my drawers.
HOW OH HOW DID THIS HAPPEN????
Not that I have anything against black socks. But dude...this whole situation has me kinda freaked.
Has anyone else experienced this phenomenon?
Please tell me I am not alone. I mean, I've heard of socks disappearing and a sock losing it's mate in the great void of the dryer....but multiplying pairs of black socks??? Disappearing pairs of white socks????
HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?????
I'm afraid if I go buy more white socks I could somehow end up with 12 pairs of orange socks.
I don't know what to do. I've never felt more alone, lost, or confused. Damn you socks. Damn you.
Anyway. In other news...
I'm alive.
I haven't written in a while for whatever reason. Sometimes the day just gets away from me. Maybe it's just that I haven't had anything important to say. (Aren't you glad my socks came along to change that?)
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1 comment:
Oh, I didn't see this post before. Cool, it's kinda like finding money you didn't know you had. Yeah, I have an uncanny number of black socks and no two of them match. I don't know if I'm missing any white ones though because there are too many to count. I buy them in econo-giganto packs so if I lose one, the remaining sock still has 98 possible mates to choose from. Haircuts: maybe you should bring a photo to the hairstylist. Boys: forget them, they just don't know how to appreciate a beautiful lesbian woman. Silly boys.
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